Living on When a Little Bit of the Magic is Gone

It has been difficult days for me, and I wanted to get back to my blog before too much time passes.  I have had some things written and saved, unable to publish because of news that keeps effecting me so deeply that I feel I’ve been more hidden.  Sometimes writing is difficult because of my immediate reaction to close off, so I go back to the safety of draft mode. My friend is missing.  Friday night he was at the Ghost Ship party in Oakland, playing music and giving hugs, two things this man is so great at doing.  There was a fire, him and other partygoers were trapped in the smoke and flames.  The warehouse party space was an artist live-work community, a creative hub with creative people.  A lot was lost that one tragic night. “I have wanted to kill myself a hundred times, but somehow I am […]

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What Nature Teaches Me About Being Thankful

It’s a tough time to celebrate Thanksgiving, for sure. As we sit with our families over a meal, a lot of bad things are going on in this world.  Yes, I am thankful that we aren’t sitting front lines to terrible atrocities happening right now. As I’m looking back on a pretty tumultuous year for me and my family, I know a lot of great things happened this year too.  Yes, I am thankful for all the blessings we all have had. As I worry for my daughter growing up in this world everyday, I know she’s been learning and growing with a firm sense of self and wonder.  Yes, I am grateful that she is such a rad kid. As I know I have been dealing with a lot of personal highs and lows this year.  As I loose friends and learn to cope with a new loneliness, I […]

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An Open Letter to my Family and Friends

Dearest family and friends; I have been processing my thoughts around this election and current state of the country…  I am not going to tell you who and what you should vote for, as I know from the results there are more than half of the country (including some of my own family and friends) remained complacent or had been part of a silent majority.  I am not here to educate you, I am not here to represent some marginalized group, and I am not here to judge you on your decision. I only ask that you, as my circle, hear me out.  In return, I promise now that if you need someone to hear you out, you should know I am hear for ya. This election has not tested my friendships, as I know we all have a right to our opinion.  This president doesn’t scare me, but the […]

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Happy Birthday to my Favorite Brother

My favorite brother because he’s my ONLY brother, “Bernie”, celebrates his birthday today and I just wanted to put it out there that I’m glad he’s another year older.  He’s come out and visited us in California a couple times this year, but we all know it’s pretty difficult to have relationships with people from afar.  He’s really such a softie when it comes to Evie.  She loves her “Tito Boy” and I hope they can always have their silly connections.  Time will tell, I guess.

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The Return to a New America

I am besides myself in grief about the election, and I know I am not alone. We spent the time before leaving the states to fill in our vote-by-mail cards and send them off, knowing that we would be away.  I wasn’t sold on Hillary, but I didn’t want Trump to win, so I voted for her.  I knew it was going to get really close.  I have never been overly political, especially on social media, but had shared some things because of this election. What Trump stands for is hate.  How could I sit back and watch as his world wants to turn my friends and family into stereotypes and generalizations… just another black man getting killed by police, just another illegal immigrant hispanic, just another muslim terrorist… just another woman to be “grabbed by the pussy”. I am not in America to celebrate mediocrity and money, as I […]

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When You Don’t Know if You Are Sinking or Swimming Anymore

It’s 7:45 am right now and I still haven’t slept.  Even though I feel like I’ve ran around town all day with a doctor appointment, a hair appointment, picking up medicine for Evie, and running lots of last minute errands today, I still have only met 50% of my Fitbit goal.  Even though I’ve spent the last 10 hours working on my laptop in the same seat of the sofa, I feel like I haven’t even made a dent in the work still yet to do.  Even though I have prepared some things for my parent’s arrival today, I will still need to clean the apartment top to bottom today. By the time you are reading this, I will be in Scandinavia enjoying some vacation time.  At this point, the craziness before the vacation, it’s hard to know if I am coming of going.  In actuality, I will probably be […]

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Happy Birthday to my Husband, Peabe

Happy, happy birthday to my husband, Peabe. I’m not as good as him when writing about our relationship, which is kinda the opposite from having this blog I guess.  Some things I just keep closer to my heart, for sure.  Just because I don’t mention him too much on here or my social channels, doesn’t mean that he doesn’t mean that he is less important, less admired, or less appreciated. We love him very much.

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The Things I’ve Learned from Hiking the Lost Coast

Starting off my life from 35 has already been an adventure.  Breaking into 36 with a crazy hike to the Lost Coast in northern California, I can only hope that bigger and better adventures await.  As I start to make my new lists for myself in this next trip around the sun, I know there’s not much moving forward without looking back on the past.  That weekend hike with Jenny not only has taught me a lot about pushing myself in my outdoor adventuring life, but also in other aspects of my world. As far as hiking and camping, I am only inspired by this to take on more challenges like this.  There are a couple things I had learned, and for all those looking to try the Lost Coast for the first time, I thought I would share it. PACKING Here’s what I brought with me: 65L backpack Bear […]

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Road Trip to LA and the Raising Bertie Premier

When our friend, Jon, told us that there was a premier for his new movie in Los Angeles, we jumped at the opportunity to be there with him.  He’s one of my husband’s oldest friends, my old roommate here in Oakland, one of our best men at our wedding, my wii-bowling nemesis, the official officiant for my wedding, and one of the most talented filmmaker and photographer I know. He left us out in Oakland one day to do some filming for a documentary in North Carolina and told us he would be back in a month or two.  He never returned.  As much as we missed him, we knew how important this was and we grew attached to the characters when he would talk about them.  It was a labor of love, filming over the span of six years, and anyone would be able to see the heart and soul […]

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Getting Back On That Bike After Falling Off

I disappear when stuff starts getting to me.  It’s a habit that I try hard to break but it’s still something so easy to fall back to.  Stuff has been getting to me and I would love to just take some time to process all of it, I don’t feel like I can. Life has all sorts of bumps and my first job as a mother just can’t stop for them.  I’m still going to make sure my daughter is taken care of.  Once she is, I’ve had some design project deadlines to worry about and then there’s this pressure to get back to writing or photography or Instagram that I’ve also signed on for when I started Ever Winding Road.  It can be a little overwhelming sometimes, but I’m going to try to work through it. The last couple weeks have been a bit of a whirlwind.  I knew October […]

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