A Lot is Happening in My Silence

It has been a tough couple months, leaving me a little angsty and questioning my own voice on matters and I know that isn’t conducive to having a blog.  The anxiety of the days that turn into weeks of silence is stressful, turning what used to be a project that I loved doing into a chore.  Why do I have this need to power off when things get tough, and how does one come back from that? I imagine I am not the only one who suffers from this and I imagine there’s things well in my control that attribute to it, so I have come to try to make sense of this silence, and try write about it. Of course, everyone has rough times that are beyond their control.  These past couple months have brought unplanned deaths and loss, moves, political changes, relationship changes within my own affiliations both […]

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How To Spend 8 Days In Cuba

Most times we are limited to how much time we take of from work and general responsibilities to go traveling.  Especially with a little one at home, I wanted to plan enough time to really experience the Cuban culture but didn’t want to spend too much time away from her.  That being said, you also want to give yourself some time to relax and recharge, and not feel like you are coming back stressed from the trip’s itinerary. After travel time, my trip ended up being about 8 days in Cuba.  I tried to get a little bit of everything, but of course you won’t be able to get everything in such a limited time.  My cousin and I kept to a certain region of the country to not spend additional time in traveling, but I would love to return one day and learn about the rest.  I am really […]

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Getting Over Feeling Overwhelmed

It’s no surprise when people tell me they’ve fallen into a funk as of lately, and I have to admit that I am in the same boat.  Life has been moving at light speed since last fall and I have been doing my best to just stay afloat.  I’m starting to feel like my personality just isn’t conducive to not feeling overwhelmed, like maybe my joys and sorrows get the best of me and can be inspiring as well as debilitating. As I made my way into March and planned for the 1-year anniversary of this blog, I was faced with incredible pride but also a sense of overwhelming pressure.  I spent a year with so many amazing experiences and documented so many things.  This blog was not just a way to have these memories shared with other, or even a chance for me to internally process my thoughts… it […]

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Making My Peace With The Year 2016

Who hasn’t been affected by the craziness of this year?  As I struggle to make sense of one thing, I am bombarded with just another bit of turbulent reality that just seems to pile up.  It was a restless 2015 that actually started the whole thing in motion, I set multiple goals for the year of 2016.  I worked towards those goals, that I knew wouldn’t be resolved in a year, but had to make steps towards them anyway.  My year was doomed from the beginning, creating a long laundry list of things to do was already going to be a stretch, but add on top all of 2016’s surprises; deaths, politics, anger, heartbreak, mistrust, sadness, failure, hardships, the list can really go on.  Bear with me in this post, it may seem like a lot of randomness, but it will all make sense in the end. Step one in […]

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The #ChicagoPeacePin Project

Together with my husband (Bryan “Peabe” Odiamar) and our friend (Jon Stuyvesant), we had shared some anger recently when we read an article in the Tribune about how 25 people were shot in a 14 hour period in Chicago.  We were all born and raised there, in Chicago, and still violent even many years back.  We were outraged.  As the number kept growing this year, we considered the social climate of the city as we continued in our own daily lives outside the city.  We wanted to do something, be active somehow, but also felt so removed from the issues being out of state.   Jon Stuyvesant currently lives in Brooklyn, New York.  He has worked in television for a variety of major networks including: NBC, ABC, OWN, TLC, A&E & MTV.   As a documentary filmmaker Jon has worked on many award winning films and most recently completed Raising Bertie, a […]

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Living on When a Little Bit of the Magic is Gone

It has been difficult days for me, and I wanted to get back to my blog before too much time passes.  I have had some things written and saved, unable to publish because of news that keeps effecting me so deeply that I feel I’ve been more hidden.  Sometimes writing is difficult because of my immediate reaction to close off, so I go back to the safety of draft mode. My friend is missing.  Friday night he was at the Ghost Ship party in Oakland, playing music and giving hugs, two things this man is so great at doing.  There was a fire, him and other partygoers were trapped in the smoke and flames.  The warehouse party space was an artist live-work community, a creative hub with creative people.  A lot was lost that one tragic night. “I have wanted to kill myself a hundred times, but somehow I am […]

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What Nature Teaches Me About Being Thankful

It’s a tough time to celebrate Thanksgiving, for sure. As we sit with our families over a meal, a lot of bad things are going on in this world.  Yes, I am thankful that we aren’t sitting front lines to terrible atrocities happening right now. As I’m looking back on a pretty tumultuous year for me and my family, I know a lot of great things happened this year too.  Yes, I am thankful for all the blessings we all have had. As I worry for my daughter growing up in this world everyday, I know she’s been learning and growing with a firm sense of self and wonder.  Yes, I am grateful that she is such a rad kid. As I know I have been dealing with a lot of personal highs and lows this year.  As I loose friends and learn to cope with a new loneliness, I […]

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An Open Letter to my Family and Friends

Dearest family and friends; I have been processing my thoughts around this election and current state of the country…  I am not going to tell you who and what you should vote for, as I know from the results there are more than half of the country (including some of my own family and friends) remained complacent or had been part of a silent majority.  I am not here to educate you, I am not here to represent some marginalized group, and I am not here to judge you on your decision. I only ask that you, as my circle, hear me out.  In return, I promise now that if you need someone to hear you out, you should know I am hear for ya. This election has not tested my friendships, as I know we all have a right to our opinion.  This president doesn’t scare me, but the […]

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Unleashing Females into the Wild

The month of October started off really testing myself on the mountains of the Lost Coast trail, and ended up watching my daughter really test herself on her longest hike to date (4.5 miles) on Angel Island and also climbing the large boulders of Yosemite’s Mirror Lake Trail. Of course I am a proud mama practically all the time, but something about her taking on these hikes makes me really glow.  There’s a lot that I’ve learned in my life through being out in nature, and I don’t think I understood it’s impact until later in life. My parents taught me a lot of self-sufficiency being out fishing or camping. I would come back from a a day spent catching on the river and wanting to immediately go out to the garden in the back to dig up some worms to bring back to the river the next weekend and […]

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Happy Birthday to my Husband, Peabe

Happy, happy birthday to my husband, Peabe. I’m not as good as him when writing about our relationship, which is kinda the opposite from having this blog I guess.  Some things I just keep closer to my heart, for sure.  Just because I don’t mention him too much on here or my social channels, doesn’t mean that he doesn’t mean that he is less important, less admired, or less appreciated. We love him very much.

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